Be really honest with yourself and notice, “Okay, I did this, I did that. This is what happened as a result.” When you see those connections, that’s when insight arises. And when you gain the insight, then you learn what to do, what not to do.

"Once you learn how to deal with the sleepiness and the pain and the distraction, you’re beginning to master the skills for understanding the mind, mastering the skills for finding happiness inside. Underlying all this is a willingness to learn, to notice your actions, to connect cause and effect, and to figure out which kinds of causes are good causes and which ones are not. When you have that attitude — that you’re here to learn — then no matter what comes up in the meditation, it becomes grist for the mill.

If you simply have it in mind that you want this or that to happen in the meditation and it doesn’t happen and you get frustrated, that’s not how you’re going to find true happiness inside. It has to come from a willingness to learn, a willingness to observe, and particularly a willingness to being alert to your own actions.

So it’s not just a matter of sitting there and watching whatever comes up. You’ve got to realize that you’re playing a role in fashioning what comes up. So you’ve got to catch yourself in the act — so you can connect the cause and the effect.

It’s not just the effects come floating around and you note, note, note this floats by, that floats by. Where is it floating from? How much of it is intentional? How much of it isn’t? That’s an important lesson to learn. And the only way you can learn it is if you’re really honest with yourself and notice, “Okay, I did this, I did that. This is what happened as a result.”

When you see those connections, that’s when insight arises. And when you gain the insight, then you learn what to do, what not to do. It’s all a question of skill."

~ Thanissaro Bhikkhu "Honesty & Integrity"

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