If you want to create skillful kamma then one of the things you've got to learn how to do is not to get focused on how you've been wronged by others.
"What kind of kamma do you want to create? If the answer is “skillful
kamma,” then one of the things you’ve got to learn how to do is not to
get focused on how you’ve been wronged by other people. You don’t want
to go around getting revenge because that just keeps the bad kammic
cycle going on and on and on.
This is what forgiveness means in
the context of mundane right view: You decide that you’re not going to
hold any danger to that person. You’re not going to try to get back at
the other person. You’ll let the issue go. Whatever unskillfulness has
been going on between the two of you, you want it to stop — and it has
to stop with you.
And that’s it. It doesn’t mean you have to love
the person or go and kiss and make up or anything, because there are
some cases where the way you’ve been wronged is so heavy that it’s
really hard even to be around the other person, much less to interact.
You’re not called on to love the person and there’s no forcing of the
issue that you have to come to closure, that you have to continue
weaving the relationship. You can just leave the frayed ends waving in
the air, and you’re done with them.
Now if you want, you can go
for a reconciliation, but that requires the other person’s cooperation
as well. Both of you have to see that the relationship is worth
continuing. But there’s no sense that every wrong has to be reconciled,
because there are lots of cases where reconciliation is impossible. One
side just doesn’t want it or won’t admit to having done wrong."
~ Thanissaro Bhikkhu "Forgiveness" (Meditations6)
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