You want to be the sort of person who habitually tries to master the most skillful strategy in any given situation. That’s really the most that can be asked of any person.

"So get your ‘self’ out of the picture. This is the actual opposite of a narcissistic practice, trying to make yourself a wonderful person or whatever attitude you might have. Even when we’re really negative on ourselves, that’s an aspect of narcissism, too. When we’re really taken up with what kind of person we want to be: That’s narcissism again.

Get your idea of who-you-are out of the picture. Just say, “Just look at this action; look at this situation. Is this the action appropriate for the situation?” If it’s not, find something else to do. Approach it in a different way.

Because what-you-are is not something that you are, it’s an action. It’s a strategy. And you want to be the sort of person who habitually tries to master the most skillful strategy in any given situation. So when you look back on the practice, if you need some encouragement when you start getting discouraged about how things are going, remind yourself, “Well, at least I have this good habit, which is trying to figure out the skillful thing to do given the situation.” That’s really the most that can be asked of any person.

You can’t demand that you’re going to reach stream-entry in the end of three months or six weeks or whatever. But you can demand, “At this moment I’m going to try to do the skillful thing.” If you’re fortunate enough, you then get another moment and you try it again. And if you’re fortunate, you get another moment, and you try it again.

Over time, the skillfulness develops, your sensitivity develops. You’re sensitive both to what you’re doing as you meditate and sensitive to the results."

~ Thanissaro Bhikkhu "How Completion is Found"

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