When dealing with difficult people, the approach we take should be determined by whether they are responsive to our actions or not. That helps put your actions and the other person’s actions into a larger perspective.

Question: The Buddha trained Rāhula in how to comport himself so that he would not be a nuisance to other people. Unfortunately, not everyone in the world is Rāhula. What attitude should one adopt in the face of people who do things that are unreflective and who have no sense of their own limits? Should we develop patience, tolerance, forgiveness? What other things should we do, especially given that we have not yet attained the first level of awakening?

Thanissaro Bhikkhu: When dealing with difficult people, the approach we take should be determined by whether they are responsive to our actions or not. Some people are responsive and we can actually have a good influence on their actions. In that case, try to be proactive in helping them. Others are difficult to deal with and will not respond. That’s where you have to develop equanimity and forgiveness. And this is why it’s good to think about the principle of kamma in general. That helps put your actions and the other person’s actions into a larger perspective.

~ The Karma of Mindfulness: The Buddha's Teachings on Sati and Kamma

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